| WARNING: The following program is unsuitable for young viewers. Parental discression is advised. Contains action of a graphic nature. Not for the faint of heart. Watching the following is consenting and condoning the following events. Legal action may not be taken against the producers or workers involved with this product. Doing so is punishable by banishment from any contact with the CNWF² indefinitely. If you have any questions about what happens at the show, please let the president know before doing anything else. In most cases he can help. |
CYBERNETIC WRESTLING FEDERATION²
_____________________________________________________________________
PRESENTS:
¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯
DANGER
ZONE!!
¯¯¯¯¯¯¯
Monday, December 1, 1997
10:00 pm - 11:00 pm PST
WELCOME
TO THE NEXT DIMENSION
_____________________________________________________________________
¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯
Location : Lake Charles, Louisiana
Arena : Lake Charles Civic Center
Maximum Attendance: 7,000
In Attendance : 6,982
¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯
{cut to shot of the commentary table}
Lex Victor, Frenchie Parker, and Knee Johnson
are sitting at the commentary ready to announce the show.
{commentary}
Lex Victor: Welcome to Danger Zone! This is more like it!
Knee Johnson: For a moment there I thought that you were calling it quits! I was going to celebrate
with a Danger Zone party. We were going to have kegs and stuff. It was goin' ta be a rockin' night.
Frenchie Parker: Ya know it!
Lex Victor: Yeah. Anyway, we have some tremendous action waiting for all of you tonight. We have
Pelius of Clamorus Fighting Death. Pelius is hoping to string together about two victories in a row so he can make
it here.
Knee Johnson: He'll never do it, Lex! Pelius is a has been from the World Wrestling Organization
and he'll never cut it here... at least not like I do!
Frenchie Parker: That's just so disgusting, Knee. I can't stand you!
Lex Victor: Anyway, we then have Kain Piller fighting Underfaker in Piller's return to action.
'Faker has really stirred up the federation, but Piller is one of the all time greats of the CNWF².
Frenchie Parker: Oh come on, Lex! We all know Piller has this one in the bag.
Knee Johnson: I'll stake a keg on it!
Lex Victor: That isn't a hard bet to win, so I won't even say anything about it. We also have Red
Slayer fighting Elliot Ness.
Knee Johnson: Damn wanna-be cops... don't we have enough real ones these days?
Lex Victor: And we have Assassin fighting the ANVIL who has been on somewhat of a losing streak
here in the CNWF². I look for Assassin to get the voctory in this one.
Frenchie Parker: We also have a return match of last Danger Zone with Fig taking on Mushroom.
Lex, I know you have a lot to say about that man.
Lex Victor: As a matter of fact, I do! I still can't believe he made a deal to film a segment in
front of the Acting President, Alejandro Valensuela, and convincend him to do it nude!
Knee Johnson: You serious Lex?
Lex Victor: I don't know why, but I guess he had this urge to see me nude, but since Alejandro
was the only guy around here who would go for a deal like that and looks a heck of a lot like me, I guess he just
had to settle for second best. I just have to wonder what that queer Mushroom was thinking!
Knee Johnson: I'll drink to that!
Frenchie Parker: You know, if Mushroom wanted to catch a man in an awkward position, it should
have been me, ya know. I could have shown him a thing or two about what he wanted... I could have given him everything
he wants! Valensuela is one lucky man! I should have been Acting President, you know.
Lex Victor: Well, who knows what the wrestlers will get the poor man to do next. I personally thought
what he did was inappropriate, and it is thankful that he did it on the late night show rather than the normal
segment show. In fact, there is a good chance there will only be two chances per week for wrestlers to speak their
mind after the Pay Per View, Broken Dreams. This is so we can save money on these tremendous channel costs. After
all, I don't think there is a soul alive who watches the CNWF² channel all day long. Of course, the profanity
and stuff like that will have to be edited out, or just not aired at all.
{pan to ringside}
The Acting President of the CNWF²
can be seen running to the commentary table. The man looks remarkably like Lex Victor. When he speaks, his voice
is close to being the same, but he instead speaks more like a weakling than a dictator like Lex Victor does.
{commentary}
Alejandro Valensuela: I can't believe you, Lex! After all the times I have saved your ass from embarassment,
this takes the cake! And you repay me like this? That is (CENSORED), man!
Lex Victor: Go to hell, Valensuela. You make me look bad.
Alejandro Valensuela: Alright! Maybe I will quit your lousy organization! Then what will you do?
Lex Victor: Who else is going to pay you three-hundred and fifty thousand dollars a year for a
job as ridiculous as yours?
Alejandro Valensuela: {taken aback} Fine, Lex. You win this time. But I am sick and damn tired of
all these horrible roles you put me in!
Lex Victor: And what are you going to do about it if you get put in another one?
Alejandro Valensuela: How about this? I challenge you to a match at Broken Dreams, '97! You up for
it you corporate sleaze bag?
{arena}
Due to the fact that this is currently
being broadcast over the public address system, the crowd cheers.
{commentary}
Lex Victor: Listen. I don't fear you, nor do I fear any man. I'll take you on in the ring any time,
bub! Now get the hell out of here!
Alejandro Valensuela: You got it, punk!
{arena}
The crowd cheers as Alejandro leaves the
commentary area.
{commentary}
Lex Victor: I'm telling you, this crap that CNI puts me through sometimes just isn't worth it.
Anyway, headlining the show we have Dominator defending his United States belt against Jason Agony. But right now,
we have Pelius of Clamorus fighting Death.
{cut to shot of the ring}
Ring Announcer: The following contest is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first from Utah,
weighing two-hundred eighty-three pounds... Pelius of Clamorus!
{cut to shot of the walkway}
"Time Machine" by Joe Satriani
plays. Upon the jumbo-tron screen is a shining blue eye; the silhouette of a cloaked man seems to stand before
it. A moment later, the hood of the cloaked man is lowered, and the helmeted head of Pelius of Clamorus is revealed.
He slowly walks toward the ring, his shadow-colored cloak fluttering behind him.
{cut to shot of the ring}
Upon reaching ringside, Pelius takes his
cloak off as well as his helmet and spiked gauntlet. He climbs up the stairs and into the ring wearing a grey vest
and breeches, a white short-sleeved shirt, and black gloves and boots.
{commentary}
Knee Johnson: Oh come on, Lex! You know he ain't never going to be like his son, the Evil Lord Pelius!
Lex Victor: I don't think he ever wants to be, either.
{ring}
Ring Announcer: And his opponent! Weighing two-hundred eighty pounds... Death!
{commentary}
Frenchie Parker: This man is like... sooo scary, ya know?
Lex Victor: No music, no lights, no nothing! Seems like the waste of an interesting name to me.
Frenchie Parker: You should give him some special lighting, then.
Lex Victor: If he doesn't want any, he doesn't get any. And it seems every time I did fix up lighting
and stuff for people, they never deserved it. I used to do it all the time, though. You remember "The Rock"?
Knee Johnson: I remember him, Lex! He was like... like a rock!
Lex Victor: Exactly. Now there was a man who deserved the song he got for his entrance. I think
that stupid song they use in those ford commercials, or chevy, or whatever truck it is went perfectly for him.
He was dumb, so he needed a dumb song to enter the ring to.
Frenchie Parker: I'm surprised, Lex! You're tellin' it like it is for once, ya know?
{ring}
Death finally enters the ring and the referee
calls for the bell. The match begins.
___________________________
Pelius of Clamorus vs Death
6'-4", 283 lbs — 6'-4", 280
lbs
(One Fall Singles Match)
¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯
{ring}
Pelius and Death quickly lock up, but
Pelius quickly turns the lockup into a hammer lock. Of course, Pelius decides not to just stand around and turns
the hammer lock into a kind of belly to back suplex where he is still keeping the hold with one hand and his other
arm around the waist of Death. He bridges the maneuver somehow, but Death kicks out. Death and Pelius are now staring
at eachother eye to eye and Death pushes Pelius. That , however, was the wrong thing to do as Pelius ran at him
after that and leveled him with a hard right hand to the jaw.
{commentary}
Frenchie Parker: That Pelius has one of the strongest right hands in the business, ya know?
Lex Victor: Well, he caught Death with a good chunk of that and now he is going for the cover. One...
two... kickout by Death. Death is back up now and is exchanging blows with Pelius... but Pelius just shoved him
to the canvas and is applying some kind of leglock on Death while he is face first on the canvas.
Knee Johnson: Man, Lex! Make 'em stop! This is supposed ta be a wrestling match, not a peep
show!
{ring}
Pelius keeps the hold on Death for a while,
wrenching at his ankle with his hands. Death somehow makes it to one of the ring ropes and grabs on. Pelius immediately
relinquishes the hold to avoid disqualification. He then walks over to Death and picks him up off the canvas. Now
he lifts him high into the air and holds him vertically.
{commentary}
Frenchie Parker: Now there's quite a display of strength from the prissy one! Go Lord Prissius!
Lex Victor: Pelius has been dominating this match thus far, so I wouldn't really consider him a
priss.
Knee Johnson: Ah, Pelius ain't nothin'! I could drink him under the table any day!
Lex Victor: I'm not sure if he even drinks alcoholic beverages on a regular basis, but wow! He slammed
Death back down to the canvas... wait... Death is already back up and is charging behind Pelius and he's got him
into a waistlock. Belly to back suplex... no! Pelius flipped out of it!
Frenchie Parker: What?
{ring}
Pelius turns around to face Death this
time, but is leveled by a clothesline. Death then goes for a cover, but as he does, Pelius grabs his arm and twists
it into a wierd position to where Death's arm is bent like a triangle where his hand is against his own body and
he is lying face first on the canvas. Pelius is applying more and more pressure to the arm and Death is screaming
in pain. He can't seem to find a way out of this hold either. Finally, Pelius in a surge of rage just rolls Death
out of the ring with force.
{commentary}
Knee Marshal: You don't think that maybe Pelius is getting back at Death for what he did
to his good friend Enligo Bekker in World Wide Wrestling, do ya?
Lex Victor: I figure that is exactly what Pelius is doing. He doesn't like it when people fight
dishonorable, and even though he may not be saying he is getting back at this man, I think he just is omitting
that fact because it wouldn't be professional to mention that on CNWF² television.
Frenchie Parker: Well, here comes Death back in the ring.
{ring}
Death is on the ring apron, but Pelius
grabs him around the waist and belly to belly suplexes him back into the ring. He now raises one of his hands in
the air.
{commentary}
Lex Victor: I think Pelius is going to end this quick! It looks like it's going to be the Confession
Maker!
Knee Marshal: No way, Lex! Pelius can't end anything quick but his own career!
{ring}
Pelius now sits on top of Death's back
and locks him into a camel clutch and applies tremendous pressure to his back. Death is screaming in pain now,
but he won't give up.
{commentary}
Lex Victor: What's wrong with this guy? Doesn't he know that Pelius isn't going to let him out of
this hold?
Frenchie Parker: He's stupid, Lex. Not everyone has the brains of a submission specialist.
Lex Victor: And I suppose you do?
Frenchie Parker: Of course! And it's your fault I never succeeded in the CNWF²! You held
me back, and the fans love me. They love my good looks.
Lex Victor: Whatever.
{ring}
Pelius is applying more and more pressure
to the hold and Death still will not give up. In fact, Pelius has so much pressure on right now that Death can't
quite breath anymore. His chest cavity is being stretched too far for him to be able to suck in any oxygen.
{commentary}
Knee Johnson: He's suffocating, Lex! I can't believe this!
Lex Victor: You know you would be enjoying this if it was Pelius on the opposite end of this hold.
Knee Johnson: Of course, Lex!
{ring}
The referee goes over and lifts up Death's
hand... and it drops limply to the canvas. He waits, then repeats this, but gets the same result. Again, he waits
then picks up Death's hand... drops it... and it drops limply one last time. No sign of coming back at all. Pelius
lets go of the hold now as the referee calls for the bell. He raises Pelius' arm in victory.
Ring Announcer: The winner of this match... Pelius of Clamorus!
There is a fair amount of cheering from
the audience as Pelius makes his way out of the ring with "Time Machine" playing until he is out of view
of them. Death eventually rolls out of the ring and makes it back to the locker room.
___________________________
Pelius of Clamorus by Submission via
The Confession Maker
¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯
{cut to shot of the commentary table}
Lex Victor: Well, that was some matchup we just saw. Death just couldn't go the distance against
Pelius, though, and he lost. That's about all there is to it.
Frenchie Parker: There's just something I don't like about Pelius, ya know? He's just too nice
for a wrestler.
Lex Victor: I thought you were a fan of submission wrestling, though.
Frenchie Parker: I'm a fan of real submission wrestling. Not big old goons posing as submission
wrestlers when you know they would rather be using their strength to pound the stuffing out of their opponents.
Lex Victor: Well, that's nice Parker, but we have to go to a commercial break. When we come back,
it's Kain Piller against the Underfaker. Don't go away!
{cut to commercial} CNWF²